Its been a funny old week really. A time when I had an awful lot of stuff to get sorted and keep on top of, but where nothing much seemed to get achieved on the big to do list. I am trying to stop doing that thing where if I don’t achieve exactly what I set out to do in a week it’s no bad thing, I won’t beat myself up and berate myself. I have achieved other things and it doesn’t make those things any less relevant because they weren’t meant to be being done does it? Does that make any sense? (It does in my head…)
I call it Creative Procrastination. We all do it. The big thing that’s meant to be being done looms over our minds, prodding us, making us feel guilty so instead we cook up batches of delicious frozen yoghurt, try (and fail again miserably) to make yoghurt from scratch, dye a pile of fabric because you suddenly have to do it right now, make things to hang in the garden that catch the light of the sun and tinkle in the breeze (we wont mention the clanging it makes in the wind), those delicious biscuits and cakes that once made need to be scoffed over cups of tea with friends, moving plants round the garden that have out grown their space or are just slightly too much over on one side for the hedge your growing to look uniform (see the picture at the top of the post – yes I really did move 2 lavender bushes ever so slightly as they didn’t look right spatially & this from the woman who cant see straight lines and generally lives in chaos). All these things could wait a week, but they suddenly become urgent, and that really important thing – has to wait a week….
So we had an absolutely ENOURMOUS full moon this week that I am blaming for the way I’ve been feeling (poor moon). It hung low in the sky with the most astonishing pink tint to it. I was driving home after a lovely evening out with friends and I spotted it in my rear view mirror. Like a woman possessed I had to stop and take a picture. Sadly it didn’t come out well at all but it gives you some idea to the amazingness of it. I know that full moons can make us feel all out of sorts and it is a time of change. Well my mind and emotions have definitely been ruled by the great big gravitational pull hanging in the sky. The dog (who is quite a lot wolf) has also spent most of the week howling like a weirdo at everything and anything. If you didn’t know she was such a wally it would sound awfully eerie.
If I was to capture pictorially how I have been feeling this week this picture below would be it. Marooned on the harbor bed, being all wrong for the space around me…. So I make things with no relevance to what I need to be doing until the tide comes back in.